We BOTH now live in Wisconsin!
Letters to the love of my life. Former LDR blog.

This morning, Vince signed off on his job offer to go back to his old job. It’s bittersweet, and I’d be a liar if I said I was completely happy about it. Spending the other night crying for awhile and getting it out of me did help my feelings immensely. It was even better to do so with him there to talk to.

I love Vince more than anything and I would be terribly selfish to deny him the opportunity to better our lives for the future. He’s my everything and trying to go week to week on funds is painstaking. It’s a burden for me when he’s unhappy. I’ve been telling him for some time that if he ever wanted to go back to this job I’d stand behind him. I meant it and I still do.

The current arrangement is that he would only be gone for two weeks at a time. I think I can manage that. What gets me the most is thinking about going to bed alone. I’ve spent the past four months safely wrapped in his arms each night. I don’t want that taken away from me. I’ll miss him when he’s gone, but I’ll manage.

Sucks.

Kara has a question.flynntuition

Kara has a question.

flynntuition

Don’t have a melt down and cry for an hour at bed time. You will wake up with a sinus infection.

Vince is probably going back to his traveling job. Back to a semi-ldr. It’s not favorable, but there’s no options.

:( This would be so easier if he didn’t have so much of my heart - but he has it all and all of me. 

I got all wound up on a bike ride for no reason, came home and cried and Vince snuck in and gave me a back rub.

Winner.

(Source: marmarbaron)

Going to spend the next two weeks evaluating what kind of job I really want during school. My daycare is short 3 teachers so they loaded me up with 44 hours this week. I’m supposed to switch to part time September 1st, but I have a suspicion it’s going to be “part time plus as many hours as we can cram into you”. 

Not to sound like a whiner but, when I get too overwhelmed and busy I tend to shut down emotionally. Last time I tried working and school I literally wanted to kill myself (thanks depression).

Having my time to myself tend to be a necessity.

I really wish Vince and I could move. I hate small town living. There are only 5-6 places I could work in town - I drive an hour to work right now - and if I want to see if those places have job openings, I have to drive there and bang on the door and find someone to talk to. I think the smarter thing on my part would have been to go to school in MSP but it’s too late to change that.

I feel very strongly that I’m going to wind up not working, but we’ll see how it goes.